Updated: Mar 17, 2019
“Ever since I can remember, I wanted to be good and to do good.”
I’m just a fellow human being appreciates everything, each and every one, whether would be past, present and the future.
I have dreams, plans and goals just like everyone else.
I have so much love and appreciation for the life I have experienced.
I’m the type of person who comes from lowlife, negative to nothing and always starting from zero and new beginnings.
Everyone else has their own problems to deal with, so I understand that and I do not want to cause any problems to anybody.
But every moment as long as I’m still breathing I’m afraid and probably selfish at the same time, of pain, sorrow, suffering and regrets. I don’t wanna get old tired, boring, slow, annoying, or frustrating.
But sometimes we have choices of what we make out of ourselves, and most of the times life you take it as it is natural process.
I’m afraid that I’ll have a bad future or might end up hurting everyone around me. Part of me what I was yesterday I’m not the same as I am today, and what I might be tomorrow will not be the same as I am today.
But no matter what the outcome might be, I know dam well for sure, a bad future isn’t something I ever wished for.
I hate the feeling of loneliness, emptiness, even sometimes when everyone else is around you. But you try so hard to be happy but just can’t seem to bear the grief.
I’m not lonely, but instead I chose to be alone, and can only pretend to be in the moment
And that’s the reason why most of the times I like to keep my distance because I don’t want to affect anyone’s happiness.
I always feel confused to the point where I don’t even care about myself.
Although I also don’t think that how I feel it’s important as long as everyone else is perfectly fine and happy, or determine how others should feel, or care about me, because people we are just different.
I don’t really know how much of star signs its true. Because as a Capricorn we are described as people who don’t care about anything at all. And yes, I don’t really take life too seriously, but deep down, I always feel most important things is positiveness, equity, equality, rightly and having good intentions in general.
Having said all that, I really don’t know how to achieve all that sadly.
I wish I could be and do it all, but I know nothing. After all I’m only human.